NewyTwistmas and Why I am Grateful to Twitter

Source: http://www.sxc.hu/photo/879671

As a responsible, internet-savvy parent, I regularly remind my children about the importance of cyber safety. They don’t use photos of their own face in any avatars and never give out personal information about their age, school or where we live. All location services are turned off and under no circumstances do they ever organise to meet with someone that they have met on the internet.

Last night I attended a local Twitter Christmas party (#NewyTwistmas) which involved meeting up with 60+ people, most of whom I have never met in person. People I have met over the internet who now know my name, what I look like and miscellaneous details about my life. Looks like this is one of those ‘Do what I say, don’t do what I do’ parenting situations, similar to informing my children that it is too close to dinner for snacks, then sneaking into the kitchen to raid the pantry for chocolate. Parenting is a complicated and, at times, contradictory business.

I have very few ‘real life’ friends on Twitter and most of them can’t understand what I see in it or why on earth I would be excited about getting together with a random group of ‘internet crazies who could be axe murderers, you know’.

For me, Twitter has been a lifeline over the past two years. At the simplest level, Twitter has facilitated connection with an amazing variety people in both a social and professional context that would otherwise be beyond the reach of a stay-at-home mum and writer who moves in quite limited social circles.  At a more significant level, several of the people I have met on Twitter have offered me unbelievable levels of support and concern as I’ve moved through two very stressful and difficult years. There have been offers of shoulders to cry on, words of friendship and encouragement, Skype calls and DM conversations that have helped to carry me through some very sad and overwhelming days.

While I’m grateful for these friendships, both frivolous and meaningful, the thing that means the most is that Twitter has connected me with myself. For many reasons, over the years I’ve modified my outward behaviour. I’ve made fewer flippant remarks, offered my opinion less frequently, become less outspoken and withdrawn in an attempt to reduce my stress levels and ‘fit in’. Of course, the result was just the opposite and my stress levels skyrocketed even as my self-esteem spiralled downwards.

On Twitter, I am myself. I chat about the issues that are meaningful to me and ignore those that aren’t. I’ve connected with people (locally, nationally and internationally) who share those interests, be it a love of books, an interest in education issues, a fascination with the creative process, an enjoyment of the offbeat and quirky, or simply a love of good conversation.

Someone commented last night that I was one of the funniest people on Twitter. I’m not about to embark on a national stand-up comedy tour based on that random remark, but that comment meant a lot. I’m sure many of my ‘real life’ friends don’t think of me as particularly funny. Vaguely amusing, perhaps, but I’m sure words like sensible, serious and the Thomas the Tank Engine trilogy of responsible, reliable and really useful would be more likely. On Twitter I loosen up somehow and feel more comfortable in my own skin, comfortable enough to offer my opinions, relax and laugh, make flippant comments and even gently mock when the situation allows.

I had a wonderful time last night at #NewyTwistmas. It wasn’t a gathering of random internet crazies. It was a gathering of friends. I loved catching up with some tweeps that I have met IRL previously, enjoyed coming face to face with some for the first time and had a wonderful time meeting new people that I will now look forward to chatting with more online.

Thank you Newcastle Tweeps for your warmth, your craziness, your sense of fun and your willingness to step outside your comfort zone to connect with others.

For another perspective on #NewyTwistmas, read this article by Anthony Scully at ABC Open.